Friday, March 23, 2007

Poop Fest '07

Who would have thought that a day that started out with this:

would end up like it has? A little time line of my day so far:

8:40 am Arwyn announces her awakening.. She has peed out of her pull-up and pooped. Clean her up, strip bed and changing table, get her dressed, start laundry.
9:00 am Eat breakfast. Watch Sesame Street.
9:30 am A friend calls, inviting us to the park. Throw on clothes and pack a bag.
10:00 am Arrive at park.
10:30 am Arwyn has to pee. Park bathrooms are LOCKED. Concept of squatting has not yet been introduced. Attempt to hold her above the ground behind a trashcan while she pees. Partially succeed.
10:45 am Get pooped on by a bird. I could not make this stuff up.
11:50 am Grab Arwyn's feet to keep her from falling off playground equipment. Get kicked in chest and covered in wet sand.
11:00 am Arwyn has to pee again. Attempt behind-the-trashcan maneuver a second time. Succeed less than first time.

11:45 am Arrive home covered head to toe in wet sand and dirt. Strip Arwyn outside, try to shake off sand. Comb sand out of Arwyn's hair and give her a much-needed bath. More laundry.
12:15 pm Make and eat lunch.
12:30 pm Arwyn pees in her pants on the recliner. Strip Arwyn, get her dressed again, strip recliner, scrub recliner, more laundry.
1:00 pm Play computer games with Arwyn.
1:15 pm While I am in the bathroom, Arwyn poops in her pants, then sticks her hand down her pants. I return to find her covered in poop. CUT OFF her clothes and throw them away. Give her another bath while she cries, throw away bath puff and get her dressed for third time. Clean tub, bathroom floor and chair she was sitting in. Take out trash. More laundry.
1:45 pm Put Arwyn down for a nap before I lose my mind.
2:00 pm Take a shower. Wonder when I can start drinking. More laundry.


theresa said...

oy, I feel your pain--but I have to admit I'm over here laughing (just a little...okay a lot)---I remember these days all too well with my kiddo. That's why I can laugh see. You are reminding me of when I was you. Have no fear, this "poo" shall pass.

theresa said...

ps. It's Friday nearly 7pm here. It's almost time to start drinking--red wine and chocolate are the best combo for a poo day. Well, maybe no chocolate.

leta joy said...

I guess you're allowed to laugh, but just a little! Bubby and I went out for a much-needed adult dinner.

Isaac said...

Leta...I am reading this while at work and laughing out loud (and snorting)--particularly the part where Arwyn sticks her hands down her pants after pooping in her pull-ups! You'll look back on that day and laugh as well. Hope you guys are doing well.

p.s. - I bought a house!


amber said...

this is hilarious. well, sort of. ok, it really is. and im laughing out loud. i hope arwyn knows she is making news all the way in singapore....or maybe it is better she doesnt know? :) very much enjoyed this post and i hope you finally found your drink!!